Interest Earned Calculator

're semi-serious reasons to hate Christmas

A Natale diventano tutti più buoni. Io invece divento più cattivo del solito. I motivi?
Primo, l'obbligo di andare a far visita ai parenti – anche quelli più odiati – e si rispolverano le prozie baffute, bisnipoti antipatici, proto-cugini pluri-laureati con lode acquisiti and godparents who stink of aftershave: they are ugly, unpleasant, they spit when they talk and they want a kiss on the cheek, not just a pat on the shoulder, say, a handshake. No, they want the kisses. Fuck you, I have not chosen and do not want to see you, migrated to Kamchatka.
Second, bastard custom of giving gifts to EVERYONE. One gives you a key that does jingle bells when you open the door and you feel obliged to reciprocate. Fuck you, you presents only a few people and give something that does not become trash after 15 days!
Third, probably the charity that you Christmas is barely pay for the damage that leads to Christmas consumerism environment and peoples of the third world.
Fourth, if you receive a computer, an IPAD or digital camera for Christmas, READ THE INSTRUCTIONS decerebration damn, can not spend the rest of the year to ask where is the handle of the USB port. So, fuck off, without giving an abacus.
Fifth, you want to put the lights? Well, great! But with the cock I pay the electricity, the mountains of beautiful extensions and connections to the counters of cursed lovers decorations. Here, you can also keep them until May.
Sixth and finally, best wishes via SMS. I remember the early days of the phone - dark times, my weighing a pound - and I remember that I replied to messages of congratulations, even those idiots with more dirty nursery rhymes (the ones where someone at the end rhymes and you bum), then I remember I used to meet the wretched I wrote and discovered that they had made a special contract with the phone company that had 400 free sms per day throughout the Christmas period. Do not respond to these bastards, but when you meet them, Beat him with an iron pipe and tell him that I will have given for free throughout the Christmas period.

Merry Christmas to all

design by Pierre Bourgeault